How to get old

An elderly woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch Though he looked weathered and feeble, he had a content smile on his face

``I couldn't help noticing how happy you look,'' she said '`What's your secret for a happy life?''

``Well, I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day,'' he said waving a wrinkled hand through the air, with a smoldering cigarette between his thumb and finger. ``I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise''